how much nothing do i have left?

the title of this note came to me for a number of reasons.
it might have more to do with a sense of tedium, unsure if it’s physical, emotional or spiritual.
maybe it’s a combination of these, mixed in with the wearying sense of “aww, shit.”
“aww shit,” is what watching or reading the news gives me.

on the bright side, now there’s only one war – that i know of – left.
in iraq, the US license “to war” expired and the iraqi parliament isn’t going to stamp our government’s war-visa for next year.
our president spun it his way (which is fine) and it made him honor a campaign promise he wasn’t ready to make happen…yet.
the republicans got all sort-of indignant and woeful, which is about their speed. they think they can still bully the planet. these guys be nucular dummasses.
the behavior of these scared white guys is despicable.
and the republican teaparty has loads of them.
i’m not sure what rates higher in their mind – greed or hate.
i could try to veil this by using nicer words, but sometimes you gotta call’em like you see’em.
even considering another texas moron who’s stupid or stupider than the last texas-republican president is an act is sheer insanity.
understanding it can happen AGAIN is testament to the wholesale ignorance propagated by the powers that be the “99%” is up against.
fool me once, shame on…uhh…
i cringed just finding this boob’s video.
how can a large portion of this country even consider someone even remotely like him?
when half the population of over 300 million people think men like these deserve to sit in a position of power, you know we’re going to hell in a handbasket.
——————-
i’m not going to blame the movement downtown for my inability to sit and write something here.
i attempted to employ this lame excuse a few nights ago in conversation with a performer after her set. having been reduced to a yammering fan, she mentioned how she enjoyed reading my notes here and i lost all composure.
i attribute it to the long, frilly gown she wore and her crystally-blue-water voice.
——————-
this morning i found a link to something someone in california wrote that as i read, my mind said, “yeah, uh, huh,” and other under-the-breath mumbles of agreement.
i understand that it doesn’t speak to the entire occupy movement but it DID speak to me some…
this is what it was and it came out of occupy oakland this past week, around the same time as the police assault.
i read it once and will give it a 24-hour rest before reading it again. it’s a broad stroke.
it touches on what’s terribly wrong in this country, but then again,…
reading it, i recalled a book entitled, “the greening of america,” written by charles reich, something that bordered on fantasy about “changes of consciousness,” that would permeate our culture, sorta-like a huge “ohhh, i get it now.”
i remember my older brother leaving the issue of the new yorker that introduced the book and can recall the cover of the issue even now. he got the paperback version of the book which i read, probably the same year i read “fear and loathing in las vegas,” making my choice of reading material as varied as my drug intake.
i bring mister reich up because, though he may not have gotten it spot-on right, he did get it close-enough to the mark that i find myself re-examining frayed edges of my memory regarding things dismissed years ago and now haltingly want to reconsider.
in the links provided, the first one was written this past june and lists facts about the author that are eerily impressive – i mean, aside from being a distinguished Yale Law School professor and justice sam alito’s teacher – like his future view of “feminism, gay rights, racial equality, an end to military conflict, rampant consumerism, and overweening corporate power.”
the overview of the occupy movement, such as i can make out, rings many of the bells he rang in “greening of america.

btw/ each “greening” link offers different info regarding the book and author. i just thought you should know.
also, if you DO consider reading this book, get the patchouli oil out.
just a suggestion.

which is as good a way as any to segue’ to my late-night journey to floyd bennett field to photograph the waning snowfall yesterday.
it was more about letting maxx run free, as it always is.

earlier in the day, as i worked on this note, i was listening to the original “godzilla.”
as i’ve said before, much of my time is spent listening to films and this score by akira ifukube reaches to things far back in my life, no doubt.
the underwater sequence toward the climax of the film was playing when i began to feel emotional, like an ocean’s weight of sadness poured into my room.

i found myself missing people who either exited my life or never made it in, my dearest friend in particular.
funny how this stuff comes and goes like that.

nothing?
i got plenty.

About stephen trimboli

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