the blue and white boxlike-truck with the distinctive auto/refrigeration combination engine sound was both in my eyes and ears as i was heading toward the store’s exit. i was inside heading out and with the truck’s lunge forward and away from the front of the place, my steps took flight….kind of.
i’m almost sure i could have stopped it with a healthy, “Yo!”
i still have a healthy, “Yo!”
i lost it for about a year, but it’s pretty-much back.
it’s drier and the quantity of “Yo!”s are limited, but the quality is still there.
i paced two strides out the door and muttered to myself, “what am i doing?”
i know what i’m doing.
i’m telling myself that i’m allowed a mister softee or freezer fresh (think about that one for a moment) or kool man whateveritis once a summer.
hell, i had one last year. i don’t remember when i had my last one. just now, i closed my eyes and remembered being in a carvel.
i think it was 1979.
the point. yes.
the refrigerator’s freezer in my apartment is not doing the “ice” thing in the words “ice cream” anymore.
it does the “cream” thing quite well.
i’m what….four? five days without ice cream?
this is a recurring theme.
waking in the morning and having to cough for 30 minutes before being able to light up that marlboro.
waking and baking.
done, done and done.
evening-time ice cream fix.
tonight, i did title this “false start…,” it’s already a small forever since then.
the freezer problem is a problem i’m not in a hurry to fix.
i live in a neighborhood where there’s plenty of opportunity to get a refrigerator.
i closed my eyes. i pictured and isolated no less than nine places to get a new or used refrigerator within three blocks of my front door.
actually, there’s a store about forty feet from house, but i won’t buy from that place.
i got my reasons.
maybe i didn’t chase after the mister softee truck because i cycled into the city today and i’d consider catching that truck a step (or roll) backwards.
besides, i wouldn’t want to get into a late-evening chat with my friend about ice cream. she asks me things like, “how’s your blood today.”
tonight, if she calls and asks, i’ll answer, “red.”
last night, she and i went to candyland.
she was explaining how she had what i guess was a maddening sense-memory urge for BB Bats. i’m not sure if that happened before or after she read my last note entry on the website here that had the picture of the Necco Wafers as the opening image. when she brought up the neccos, i had to confess that they were intended for her but i couldn’t hold out.
i followed that up with telling her that i ate the twizzlers i got for her, too.
and the licorice whips. yeah, i ate them too.
i didn’t do this all at once. it took a while….don’t get the right idea here…
as we spoke, i googled something and found a website with a list of discontinued candies and we poured over the names and were crushed when we learned that certain products were gone forever while others are still available. this conversation was loaded with artificial everything and neither of us cared; regal crown sours, pine brothers soft, chewy cherry cough drops, pom poms, screaming yellow zonkers, adams sourapple gum,…it went on and on.
she reminded me that chocolate neccos used to be available by the pack.
i forgot about that.
this caused my ride to the city today to include a visit to economy candy where i re-upped the candy i made disappear and found some stuff we spoke about last night.
just being there got me woozy with sugar molecules dancing everywhere causing the light fixtures to discolor slightly, my eyes seeing momentary separations of the light spectrum.
ok. that didn’t happen, but i was having a good time imagining it.