3am, a black and white videosoundtrack, pictures i took when lizard-hunting


the little birds at the shore in the pic above are known as “terns” and one of the first things i learned back when i would cycle out here in the late 1980’s, there, in the scrap bar days, was that this area, “gateway national park”was a breeding and nesting site for these wonderful little birds. at the height of summer there are signs everywhere advising all humans to keep away from these little guys and their nests because our behavior is poisonous to them. when maxx and me walked along the shore, the terns walked very quickly and purposefully away from us at the water’s edge and look regal when they took flight….

…needless to say, i took the first photo and someone named Koajisashi took the other one. he has a real good camera.
apparently, the terns population is diminishing. i’m sure we have something to do with it. we have something to do with everything except when nature shows how insignificant we really are, and a lot of the times, the wrath of nature is at times, simply cause and effect. nature doesn’t give a rat’s ass about terns and probably less about us. if nature ever took anything we did personally, our ass would be history. ancient history. if nature could personally kick someone’s ass, lightning would never stop striking everywhere on the planet killing humanity with each and every strike all the time, day and night.

….but i’m stringing this together at almost four in the morning, listening to fred and ginger (thanks TCM, thanks black, white and all the greys in between) sing songs from the Gay Divorcee, Top Hat and other depressionetta (i won’t hit you with another youtube link so soon after the rainy day one). the loss of will to worry myself sick about everything that’s going on these days made me ride to the beach today(wed). i’ve been in the midst of my own depression and have, for some time now, found solace in the deco world of FDR and old movies when at home, leaving the actions of the grifting lizards* and the umbo box away from this beach though it was here that my acquaintance with them first ocurred. i thought to seek them out. there was one of those silver mercedes box-shaped jeeps parked in the lot today. i’ll bet it was them. they’ve upgraded their acura ride since last march, but i chose to avoid them today. i wanted to be closer to my spiritual base today, and i decided that this place must be my natural cathedral.

i don’t need architecture, impressive as it might be, to tell me that the big math is always adding and subtracting. that we’re lucky and unlucky, here and gone. that life’s fair and unfair. i’m writing this down because i need to say it out loud and read it with my own eyes. as i look through the viewfinder of my camera, or as i digicomp this onto this blogbase, i’m forever marvelling,”ain’t this some amazing shit,” being one with these moments is spiritual enough for me, especially when i come back to town (or earth) where spituality is measured in my not taking a baseball bat to some shitheel’s car who attempts to extort money from me because i touch his bumper with my bumper. “that’s why cars have bumpers, asswipe.”
why this “spiritual” bent to this writing? probably because i’m casually terrified. or maybe because i’m coming up on the first-year anniversary of cancer surgery and i’m thinking about how often i’m whistling past the graveyard.

as i wandered with my dog, i happened upon a whole lot of these butterflies;
“The Monarch” is an amazing butterfly that migrates through here every year on a four-thousand-mile trip to southern cal and mexico. i have to remember that this is different from the one from the Venture Brothers cartoon although, well……

god, i got this thing about doctor girlfriend……but i digress……it’s this brunette thing…but back to where i’ve been wandering…..making peace with jury duty.
they got me. they’ll get everyone. but they’ve gotten so good at this search and employ, they’ve got a massive jury pool and you only need serve every eight years now. plus, it’s part of being, like a citizen and stuff, you know…..

About stephen trimboli

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2 Responses to 3am, a black and white videosoundtrack, pictures i took when lizard-hunting

  1. Stacey says:

    Hello Steve….Good to read your blog…..you had not written in a quite a few days…..I actually went to visit Gateway National Park….last weekend….no dogs ..I did feel guilty but next time..did not tell anyone where I was going..just got in the car and left …just me….got lost but I can get lost “coming out of a paper bag” as it goes but finally found it….it was like another world….a beautiful world…..your pictures do it justice but to actually be there was ….well U know…..I actually fell asleep in the sand and the sun felt so good and the breeze felt even better ….I was interupted by a kid about 12 yr old who stopped to ask if I was “ok”….I thought for a moment and I really was “ok”…better than “ok”….tomorrow would be same shit different day but for that moment life was good…..Thank U

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