utilities…..and the tools that run them

this past weekend, what with the “troubles due to the correction in the market” (ain’t that a line!), knowing full-well that whatever martian lizards, weasly powergreed-maggots and crooked politicians do is far beyond my control, i spent a few hours looking at what i could do to stave off my own scary monsters; right off the bat on monday morning i knew that con edison, the darth vader of utilities, would be on top of my list. i  isolated the necessary funds needed to satisfy the electrobeast because i know all too well that envelopes filled with threatening and horrible words would be on their way this week if i didn’t get my payments for both my store and my apartment in on Monday, September 22nd., the date specified on both of my bills. Having danced with these demons often enough i knew that by wednesday (thursday the latest), envelopes with  RED STRIPES that say DATED INFORMATION would descend upon my mail slot.

I need to back up for second. KeyspanNationalGrid sends bills, second notices and cut-off notices, as do Calblevision, Phone companies and anyone else who does business with the consumer. Is it me, or is Con Ed’s manner of doing business a little more manic, bullying and sinister? I got a bill from KeyspanNationalGrid last week for three-thousand dollars. THREE THOUSAND DOLLARS. When i called them to question this, they told me that this bill was incorrect. They told me it was SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS. I told them (calmly) that i have one, fifty-gallon hot water heater in my store and absolutely nothing else that uses gas. They said that they’ll investigate. The manner in which we communicated was civil. There is no civility with Con Ed. They guarantee yearly dividends to their stockholders. They call their own shots and tells the Public Service Commission (a body that attempts to regulate them) what’s what.
This is the same shit that the banks and the financial sector has been doing for years.
It reminds me of the old teamster joke;
Q: – how many teamsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: – ten. You got a fuckin’ problem with that?
That was when the Unions were the geniuses. it seems like everybody is “a fucking genius” maybe once in a lifetime. maybe some people get to wear the hat more than once or twice. it might equate with Warhol’s fifteen minutes of fame. there’s probably an actuary table that corresponds to that.
The abuses of labor and management are old, but people have to remember that unions are relatively new in the history of labor-relations and they’re being beaten to a pulp in the world economy. Reagan and the Air-Flight Controllers signaled the end of that. China’s expansion will take of the rest, but then again, i’m not an economist, labor leader or politician, but apparently neither are a whole lot of economists, labor leaders and politicians. They’re too busy being geniuses.

But the point……it  had to do with Con Ed. This morning i received a notice. I can only look at it as a”pre-emptive bill-paying attack .” It told me that they were turning off my electric service for non payment from a remote location or that they were going to remove mt meter. they then told me about the fees and penalties they would levy on me for putting them through such horrific actions. Bear in mind that this is september the 22nd. they sent this a few days ago, before the weekend. the only explanation i can think of is we might know where george W. might end up after his disgraceful presidency is finally laid to rest. well, hello new york……..

About stephen trimboli

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